I found this collection of extremely violent and turd fixated stories a few years back on a website called Odd Todds Disgusting Stories. Unfortunately, I've been unable to find the site again recently. If anyone has any idea where else Odd Todd has written, please send me an email
I feel that I should include the warning that was on the original site:
This page is visited only by murderers, freaks, retards, doodylovers, sex fiends, cunters, psychos, nuns, warped brainerds, pee pee pants people, scummers, cockfucks, hatred spreaders, organ eaters, dumb assholes, rapists, diarrhea drinkers, god haters, penises, swedish dorks, and limbless children.
If you are none of the above, you are not welcome here and if you continue onwards I'll have you killed.
Enough said...
| Surgical Deathday Party | Hospital visits, drugs and mutilation. |
| Roaches 'R' Us | Enjoying free time on a Saturday afternoon. |
| Greasing The Wheels | Are you ever annoyed by people? People being slow, stupid. People getting in the way - holding up progress. Strike back. |
| Murderama | Another helter skelter of semi-concious thought. With Guns! |
| The Celebration of Evolution | A very disturbingly accurate view of work. |
| Respectfully Brown | Todd's in his element of being violent and involved in shit. |
| Having Fun With Guns and People | The issues involved with getting into a packed club and dealing with the 'door staff'. |
| Clown Of Thorns | How to do professional kiddies entertainment that they'll remember for ever. |
| Proctological Super Surprise | Turds, filth, "doodybombs", latex gloves. The usual. |
| Customer Served | How to deal with the public on the shop floor using nothing more than foul language and a homicidally violent personality disorder. |
| The Bus Ride | Fame can strike at any moment, in the most unlikely of places. |
| Rearing My Ugly Head | Remember kids, first impressions count - so don't fuck it up. |
| Love Is A Battlefield | How to convey joy, love and special warm 'n' fuzzy feelings to your fellow apes. |
| Funning The Doctors | Another medical emergency. |
| Pigeon Man Vents | Larking about in the park. |
| Lumberjacking | An in depth investigation into the nature of reality. What is wood? What are trees? I mean - what are they *really*? Would you know a tree if you met one in the street? |
| The Pope Makes Poop | Deep in the labrynth of passageways of the Vatican, a major problem is brewing... |
| The Good, The Bad And The Lysol Disinfectant Spray | Out on the town, checking out the female action, checking out the sex shops and generally being weird - with Lysol. |
| Murder In The Church | A serious theological and eucumenical matter is addressed in Todds unique way. |
| My Sleeping Angel | Love. (Including the vomit and faeces parts). |
| Brain Lizard | A lizard that lives in Todds brain. What else did you think it would be about? |
| Jimmy Cracked Head | Childhood memories. |
| Oiled Up For The Lightning Show | Another night on the town. More door staff. |
| Beating Up A Retard | Nuff said. |
| Normal Day Mutation | Nakedness, pensioners, urine, tentacles, cellular mutation. |
| City Fisherman | An interesting idea. |
| A Fun Day In May | More childhood memories. |
| Magic Man | A magician with a love for children that's er... illegal. |
| A Walk In The Town Of Hell | The title says it all. |
| Supermarket Shit | Ever been caught short in a public place? |
| Me and You and a Dog Named Crud | A dog is a mans best friend. |